p>

Take Michelle Obama’s penchant for wearing high-priced designer duds, which contrasted with the off-the-rack, working mom style she projected during the primary campaign. Once Barack Obama was elected, Michelle Obama started giving more serious thought to what unspoken messages the first family projected. “She was . . . acutely aware that she and her family were the country’s, and the world’s, most important African American role models,” Kantor wrote. “Changing stereotypes was part of why the Obamas had run in the first place, part of why she wanted everything to look as beautiful and refined as possible.”

But then White House officials, citing the dour economy and high unemployment numbers, started grumbling about the first lady’s wardrobe and, as Kantor observed, the East Wing’s “emphasis on style gave the political advisers . . . the willies.” “In general,” Kantor added, “her clothes made a lot of aides nervous.” Yet the moment Michelle Obama dared to step outside one day to walk the dog, make-up-less and clad in shorts, she got slammed for looking sloppy, un-first ladylike.

Imagine getting grief from inside the White House, from members of the administration, as well as from the news media, web sites, talk shows and political opponents over practically everything you do. It’s hard to imagine how the first family wouldn’t feel under siege. As the Republican candidates and their spouses traverse the early primary states and the Obamas gear up for round two in the presidential sweepstakes, how many of the candidates’ spouses do you think are secretly praying that their husbands will lose so they can have lives that are really their own?

If Barack Obama is re-elected, I hope that Michelle Obama will continue to plow ahead -- no matter the resistance she encounters -- and tries to carve out a little more breathing room for the first lady to be an authentic reflection of modern women, for her sake and for the sake of future first spouses. And I hope that the public gives that first spouse a break. It’s an impossible job.

Originally posted on ModernMom