Single Mama Drama.

by Vicki Larson

 

I was a relatively new divorcee when I started working at Company A. The full-time work was a welcome diversion from the emotionally hellish time I had just gone through, but it was the first time I’d worked full time as a mom.

 

I know it would be an adjustment for my two boys and for me; I just didn’t realize in what ways it might impact a lot of other things as well.

 

“Anna,” one of my co-workers, was a single mom by choice, and every day it seemed that her household was experiencing some sort of drama that often had her miss days or have to leave early. When her children got sick, she often brought them into the office. I began hearing grumblings from management, saw how some of my co-workers reacted — non-parent as well as men whose wives either stayed at home or worked part time — and made a vow. I would not talk too much about my own kids, then age 11 and 14, while at work and would forget about taking days off to drive on field trips and volunteer at the snack bar.

 

So, of course, that’s exactly when my own household started experiencing drama. My older son, then a high school freshman, began making bad choices and started struggling in school — a typical post-divorce scenario. My after-school phone calls to him became increasing frequent and noticeably louder, filled with frustration from trying to control something that I really couldn’t from behind my workplace desk. Then there were the phone calls to his dad, who shares 50 percent custody. Now, the people around me at work were looking at me the same way they looked at “Anna.”

vlarson
12.16.08

I'd like to think so, Single Mama (and thanks for reading and commenting). I often wonder if our kids will decide having kids isn't worth it (a big mistake, in my mind), or if our daughters will decide, "what the heck; might as well just stay home."

Single Mama
12.13.08

Being of the feminist era, it's enough that there is gender discrimination let alone maternal profiling. Our children at least see us in a realistic view with our foibles and love. Maybe it will help them be realistic in their future choices with a mate, children, and careers.