by Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
I believe there’s no shame in loving Barry Manilow.
I believe that people who don’t drink coffee in the morning are suspect.
I believe flossing every day is overkill.
I believe Botox is an amazing invention - provided you’re not a fan of winking.
I believe Twitter is trying to steal my soul.
I believe in an afterlife- I have to.
I believe that deep down most people are good – except those profiled on my favorite crime documentaries. And people who don’t comment.
I believe Ariel is the coolest princess.
I believe consistency is the spice of life.
I believe you’re never too old to have a BFF.
I believe in the healing power of love.
I believe in the healing power of Zoloft. And candy (especially if that candy is Hot Tamales because, yum).
I believe it’s important to own a great hat.
I believe in a sixth sense (I also loved that movie).
I believe airlines should go back to offering peanuts. Peanuts are delicious. Pretzels, not so much.
I believe if you buy a cup of coffee for $1.99 and you hand the cashier two bucks, life is too short to wait for your penny in change.
I believe you should stop expecting birthday presents once you’re an adult. Especially from your friends.
I believe talking on your cell phone while working out on the Precor machine right next to me should be considered a war crime.
I believe Love Actually is an underrated movie.
I believe John Mayer should have to register himself as a repeat relationship offender.
I believe reading bedtimes stories is an absolute requirement of parenting.
I believe David Letterman has still got it.
I believe in pedicures.
I believe in the Official Scrabble Players’ Dictionary.
I believe Earth Day always seems to come too fast. First it’s Easter and suddenly out of nowhere, it’s Earth Day.
I believe in the check/raise.
I believe that black jelly beans are the best.
I believe that having sex three times a week is a lofty goal.
I believe in the power of a great memoir.
I believe everyone should learn to speak Spanish. And I intend to get on that.
I believe that bowling should be demoted from a sport to a drinking game. Same with darts. And billiards.
I believe a lot of people only pretend to love David Sedaris.
I believe that children are our future…oh wait…no, that’s Whitney Houston.
I believe the solution to a big butt is a good pair of black pants.
I believe in Santa Claus.
I believe that school vacation should not be allowed to be called “vacation.”
I believe you can never own too much lip gloss.
I believe there is no problem that cannot be solved with good sushi.
I believe in getting a second opinion.
I believe that no good can come from a tongue piercing.
I believe that Airborne is a waste of thirteen dollars.
I believe I was given a child with some “challenges” for a reason.
I believe in over tipping for good service (of course I was a waitress so I get it).
I believe in starting every day being grateful.
And finally, I believe that if you don’t love the Housewives series, we will probably never be friends.