Were You Raised By Wolves?
It’s not just because you enjoy my occasional column or liked my first two books that I would encourage you to run out immediately and buy my new book (Were You Raised By Wolves: Clues to the Mysteries of Adulthood – Collins, April 8). After all, my new book is really geared more towards the twenty-something set. If you’re the parent of younger children, you might wonder, “Why do I have to buy it now? Why can’t I wait? For Pete’s sake, my child just entered first grade, leave me alone.” Of course you can wait! Give it as a college graduation present! Save it for when your son turns twenty-five and you find he’s still living in your downstairs rec room. Because it might really come in handy right about then.
Parents of young children take heed: first of all, I have always wanted to use “take heed” in a sentence, and have finally found that opportunity. It’s so medieval and sage, isn’t it? Yet hasn’t become tainted with cliché, much like the overused “but I digress.”
But I digress. What I’m getting at is, why wait? You yourself, though possibly many years past your twenties, might really like this book. You might be pleasantly surprised to find pages chock full of amusing, entertaining and yet very useful advice. Although an experienced working and parental adult, you might actually learn some new and interesting bits of information that could prove valuable around the house, or in a tricky social situation. But most important, it may begin to dawn on you that your adorable toddler or fourth-grader will be a teenager in a very few years. And soon after that, he’ll be out of the house. At least, theoretically.
Let’s just say you read The Three-Martini Playdate. You enjoyed it, but didn’t take all of my helpful hints to heart. And since then, you’ve basically been doing everything to smooth the bumpy road of life for your over-scheduled children. And your cherub-cheeked angels have never learned how to wash dishes or set a table. They are but a few years away from going out into the big, wide world, and they still grab food off your dinner plate and barely know how to carry on an actual conversation with a grown-up. After reading my new book you will certainly come to realize the importance of giving your children the tools to become self-sufficient and independent humans now, before they leave the safety and shelter of your home.