The Penis Problem.
I know it’s all normal and I know he’ll get it under control eventually, so, why, you might ask, is his penis a Problem with a capital P? Well, why else? It’s the girls. For whatever reason, very few of my daughter’s friends have brothers, and when these friends come over to our house, my little pantless wonder is often their first exposure to the male anatomy. Sure, they’ve probably seen their dads, but it’s not the same as when it’s on a kid, who’s having fun twirling it. They stare at it. They laugh at it. Then they stare at it some more, and all I can think about is them going home and telling their mothers about the great playdate they had at our house with Harper and Davis and Davis’s penis. So I whisper to him. "Davis, you need to put your pants on when we have guests." "But, we’re at home," he argues. "You said I only have to wear pants when we go out." Which is true. I did say that. But what good am I as a mother if I don’t make up confusing, contradictory rules that change with each new circumstance?
So now we wear pants to school, and we wear pants when we have guests. But when we’re home with no guests, we don’t wear pants. I’m sure new circumstances will arise, and as they do, I’ll continue to make Penis rules asI see fit. But I’m really looking forward to a time when his penis becomes his problem, and not mine.